Cracovia-terror!

På et tog et sted i evigheten

I det du snur deg og ser på meg går det opp for deg at du aldri burde gjort det.

Jeg synes ikke synd på deg.

Attic International

Krakow

Picture me

Confused

I want....

all those frozen strawberries, i used to chill your bruisy knees

writer's block.

hmmm.

FAEN!

Would I ever lie to you?

On my tip toes...

For the longest time...

Only your fool for a while...



1970's



"Alt går bra til slutt"

Hold on to me

... We all get our glory
Our little bit of fame
But there's no truth at the heart of any of it
Just the brilliance and the passion
And the bitterness remains

He brings me down
Oh, down into the ground
I never will get out
I never will get out

Hush, your highness
Don't you breathe
No, baby, hold me in your arms
I'm shivering

But what's all this for?
If I was the battle
Baby, you have won the war...

- Courtney Love

Burn the witch

De satt der rekke på rad. Langs veggen, iført sine peneste kjoler og mest kostbare smykker. En etter en reiste de seg, bukket dypt, og satte seg ned igjen. I midten satt to søstre med røde kjoler og svart hår og brunt hår og grønne øyne og blå øyne. Da jeg kom inn i rommet la jeg kun merke til de hvite høytalerne overtrukket med lilla silke. Silken bølget i tilfeldige retninger, i takt med de lavfrekvente dunkene fra musikken. Must be the season of the witch. Den styggeste av søstrene grep fatt i hånden min og førte meg ut av rommet. Jeg visste akkurat hva hun ville, og fulgte gjerne etter gjennom gangen og ned trappen hvor vi stoppet. Det lignet mer en byggeplass enn en del av det fine huset. Det trakk en kjølig vind gjennom hele rommet, kulden trakk nedover ryggraden min og jeg måtte gispe etter pust. Rundt halsen til søsteren hang et pentagram og øynene hennes flammet opp idet jeg løftet hånden for å ta på henne. Sekundet med ubehag som oppsto forsvant like etter. Vi vippet hodene til hver våre sider og jeg var ikke sikker på om det var den rette tingen å gjøre. Jeg prøvde å finne tungen min for å fukte leppene, og nå så jeg at også søsteren hadde gåsehud helt fra øvre del av halsen og ned rundt kragebena. Det var vanskelig å se inn i øynene hennes, jeg stolte ikke på henne, men likevel hadde hun en kraft rundt seg som ga meg en følelse som nærmet seg tilfredshet. Forbi neste dør lå soverommene. Hvis vi kunne... Øyeblikket gikk mot sin slutt, og jeg måtte gjøre eller glemme. Et forsiktig kyss på hennes kinn kjentes først kaldt som is, men etter hvert kunne jeg få frosten til å forsvinne. Hun stod stille, men så kunne jeg føle at hun hadde ombestemt seg. Armene hennes gled som slanger rundt halsen min. Den ene hånden tok tak i håret mitt, og den andre gled nedover ryggraden min. Kroppene våre presset seg mot hverandre som to magneter, og begge laget instinktivt en åpning i munnen. Da leppene våre møtte hverandre var det som noen skrudde av alle fysiske sanser. Det var ikke lenger et kyss, men en sammensmeltning av ladninger som hadde bygget seg opp. Det var som om vi hele livet hadde hatt disse ladningene i oss, som celler i blodet, som et element av sjelen. Da tungene våre møttes for å forevige, ble jeg flenget ut av uvirkeligheten. Tungen hennes var ru som sandpapir og tørrere enn sand. Jeg sperret øynene opp og så henne gå opp i flammer. Ikke en gang asken lot hun ligge igjen.

Who loves, raves

heartbeats

hvis vi kunne

det ville vært mye lettere

hvis jeg kunne gråte

hvis jeg kunne skrike i frustrasjon

hvis jeg kunne grave hodet ned i puten

hvis du kunne være her for å vise meg smerten min

og for å påføre meg smerten uten å røre noen ting som helst

Vintage

You speak so softly
inches from my mind

Dowager Queen
of your heart

the words of the prophets are written on the subway walls

Fat Fariry's metalblue recovery disk

Fat fairy keeps songs for broken and mended hearts in her blue box, sometimes I steal it and go for a stroll in the park

1. Fix you - Coldplay
2. Cut up Angels - the Used
3. Doll parts - Hole
4. Best of you - Foo Fighters
5. 505 - Arctic Monkeys
6. Sola skinner - Jokke og valentinerne
7. Fields of Gold - Eva Cassidy / Sting
8. Come away with me - Norah Jones
9. Little wing - Jimi Hendrix
10. Scar tissue - RHCP
11. Wish you were here - Pink Floyd
12. Come pick me up - Ryan Adams
13. Last Christmas - Wham
14. The Gymnopediès - Erik Satie
15. Claire De lune - Claude Debussy

Come a little bit closer...

And write down some songs you like, the walk is long

fanger på fortet

Conclusion:

I figured something out
because I can't sleep
I can't wait anymore either
but I know I'm fucked up enough to do it...
just wait

So please don't listen when I dream

It feels good when you crush me
because I've needed a warm touch for so long
but

you're not him
you're not silent friend
the one I don't know if is friend or a foe
you're not pale blue eyes
you're not korky conversations and smiles
you're not laughter and electricity
you're not I close my eyes and wish you were here
you're not him

I need him
the one with the pale blue eyes
I need him to hold my hand
I need him to kiss me first
I need him to tell me to relax
I need him to sit with me under a tree and eat apples
I need him to touch me and capture me
I need him because I want him to need me

Why?
Because never judges
Because the memory of a cold winters night
in the middle of summer
Because chemistry
Because he got in my heart
Because make it all right
Because sleepless nights and daydreams
Because he's that place I'd rather be at
Because until I stop breathing he is all the shades of gray
Because I think I actually

The most unreal real thing

To be or not to be is bullshit

To love or not to love, that is the question

Microwave charity

I dag ga jeg penger til gatebarn i Romania

Bare fordi han var søt

Dreaming

When I slept last night I saw him ripping my chest open, taking my pounding heart out, before he left me there alone, bleeding and sobbing on the floor. I cried, I cried for days and nights, until I had no tears left to shed. Then, in the silence, without my heartbroken sobbing, I heard the sound of a heartbeat that was not my own. I followed the sound, and I did not need to go far before I spotted his heart on the floor, still beating, and I realized that he was heartbroken too, and that he would come back to me one day. So I placed his heart in a little wooden chest, and carried it with me, wherever I went, together with the little black book in wich I write my fairytales and dreams.
Then I woke up.

Fake Tales

Pt. 1 Four Ever

We sit on the top of the world. Fooling around with cans of colours. We're gonna own these streets some day. Make a wish, make a wish and blow the cold away.

We close our eyes and make a wish. We dance, and laugh. No one is there, all eyes on us.

Do you see us? Now we have your attention. Four girls, a part of fake tales, a part of the world. We don't have names, you could say we are...ghosts. None of this is real. We'll never realize it though. Someone makes us up along the way. It’s weird, when you find your angels, how they seem to drift away. You make us up along the way. I hope you dream of us. We are here. Always.

The story about the boy in her basement, it isn't true, but it's going to be. Watch me burn.

Do you know how it feels like? Being torn apart. I’m pretty sure you do. You can’t breathe, you can’t sleep. You lie there twisting around in your bed. Everything is annoying. Everything is ugly. I'm your pretty little princess when it's dark. But at daylight, I don't know, you wouldn't know it was me. You could kiss me when I'm drunk, or fool around with me. I'd let you. I love to laugh. I love to love. Let me give you a piece of my love. Things you'd never see, you would never see me hurt, or cry. People say my life is like taken out of a fairytale. They don't know me. They've seen pictures of me, good pictures, that makes me smile. My life, is a sad story like all the others. Broken home, broken heart. Smile to me. Lie to me, make me happy. I hold her hand. She tells me I'm Miss World. I trust her to make it all right for just a moment. We walk and share a smoke. It hurts tonight. I’m so angry at my other half. Both of my other halves.

She had to fuck about it this morning. How empty she is. Take a look at me! Which part of me is filled up with what ever you want? Name it, and I'll give it to you. But you won’t name it. You love your sorrows. And he loves your pain. One side is darker than the other, but then again, both sides can be so wonderful on a good day. Is it just illusions I recall? I know what I’ve experienced and what I’ve seen. They make me feel safe, my friends.

Once upon a dream HE kissed her

I waited for you, in the cold, you know. I made fairytales out of my breath. Clichés, with princes and princesses. They melted together with the snow. I was thinking, maybe I was over thinking it. My hands were so cold. I needed someone to hold around them. I'd forgotten my gloves at home. I know you opened that door for me, and expected me to take the next step. But you put me in a position where I couldn't move. I can't move even now. Though you're drifting further and further away. Where are you going? And why are you leaving me behind? I just need my hands to get warm... maybe I should buy myself some coffee. 7- eleven coffee. No sleep, only agony. A pit hole with no emotions. Where are all my emotions? You promised me. It's all my fault isn't it? I'll sit in the schoolyard, late at night, hearing. It's so comforting the sound of voices. The voices of sound. Fake tales in my room tonight, by the open window to your open door. I'll drift to you in my thoughts while the streetlights are still on, while there are still people passing by my window down the street. I want to text you, ask you how you've been, without playing any silly little games. I'm so sick of these games. But you always make me play with you. Like little brats in the kindergarten, making ponds stuffed with imaginary fishes. And then suddenly we are in my basement. And your face is inches away from mine. Why can't I kiss you? Why can't I be happy? I feel it, I feel it everywhere. I want to melt with you. No! I want you to melt with me. When you leave, you leave me empty.

Time goes by. Tick tock, tick tock... says the sky. I have to do something. Tick tock rapist soul. Tick tock, tick tock. I'll do something stupid that I'll never regret.

Blondes have more fun!

Do we really? I had fun tonight. I had a blast, but when I came home I started thinking. They are leaving. I put on really loud music. It works. Wish I could stuff my head with it, like a stuffed doll you know. I’d be doll parts, doll eyes, doll legs and doll mouth. Would you play with me if I was a doll? If I never talked, never spoke my mind. If I was a creature out of your imagination, would you play with me? I know you are lonely, master of puppets, I know you are. So am I. I want to write, but dolls can’t write. They have other duties. I want to swing, but dolls can’t do that either, they have to attend tea parties with rabbits, falling down black holes to make it. I want to be more than something in a child’s imagination. I want to live. I want to break free how ever stupid it might sound. Maybe I’ll leave to chase my dream too?

And he completes her empty, when he’s there.

It hurts, in my lungs, in my head, in my heart. Physically. It hurts. I don't know what to do, so I stay at school, I go early and leave late. I read about it, to find out what it can be. I can't find any answers. I want you to see how much it hurts. But you're blind. You are even more fragile than I am. I want to make it all right. If I could make a wish, I'd make all the pain in the world go away. But if we felt no pain we'd feel no happiness... I don’t believe that, I want the pain to go away. I walk the graveyard path, I like to read their names. Is that weird? I like to walk. I'm afraid to let go, so I hold on to what I've got. It's slipping through my fingers. I can fix this. I wish I could make the time take us back to a time when you were happy. To a time when your eyes didn't have the frost in them. The car is moving, there are no rabbits in our headlights tonight. I see the world through a foggy window covered with raindrops. Like a dream. Yellow streetlights, the comforting sound of raindrops on the roof. I want to sleep, but I stay awake, I don't want to miss a thing. I don’t want to forget last night. In the basement. The world spinning around in your basement. Music. People. Laughter. Tears. Making love in that basement. Dancing, drinking, smoking. Laying outside watching the stars before we walk in. Cold walk home. Bottles and games, sound of glasses clinging together in a cheer. «Is there a certain angel you're supposed to be?» I ask the air in front of me. I think of you. I watch you, you watch me. You and I standing in a bathroom line. You tell me you got my heart and you make a hand gesture over your chest, touching over your own heart. I don't know what it's supposed to mean, but for some reason I know you're not playing with me. As you lean in, I tell you, I've got you heart too, you whisper sad stories in my ear. I sit alone in space, the cold air and the galaxy. Contradictions right? There is no air in space. Space is cold. It clears my head. You have spellbound us all, bodies and souls. I know, I don't have to wonder. You'll keep it safe. Like the boy in that song ”Pale blue eyes so young, pale blue eyes so far away” You’re not far away, you are here, and you are real. You’re like that...

PAKKEOPPTELLINGSJULEKALENDER

Elsker du meg

Jeg vet du elsker meg.
Men elsker du meg - Virkelig?
Elsker du meg halvparten så mye som jeg elsker deg?

Elsker du meg - Egentlig?

Hvorfor må jeg spørre når jeg vet svaret?

Du gjør meg lykkelig - og jeg er redd for å miste deg...

Fake Tales Introduction

"Where do you go when you're sad?"
"I walk in my dreams...


I walk the streets of the old home I once had. Standing under the street lights the whole night. I stand there remembering, toilets, the smell of our secret garden, pictures, the first sight of rock music, soda coins, the taste of coke in your mouth, laughter, clouds, the song from birds and the color of the sky. Remembering memories we made and had.
I walk the old path, dirty and beautiful, the path from my childhood, through the big and dark forest. Climbing the tree they cut down, sitting there reading until faeries fly me away, down into my bed. Waiting for the sweet moment you had in store for me. Reading old notes from a back pocket.
I sit alone with flowers in my hair, watching the view, watching. Then I close my eyes. I feel the cold hard stone under me, I feel the marks of peoples hopes and dreams carved into the bench. "We fight until we die", "we are so fairytale it makes people sick", I love him", "I love her", for ever this for ever that, words that will disappear. I bring back old friends. I drink and make amends. With myself and everyone I know.
Then I will dance, all alone in the pouring rain, but everywhere I turn, still, people stare at me. I move, to dance all alone in my basement, but it's so cold in my basement, my skin feels so bad. Like a drowned American highway that constantly has to bear the weight of other people. Sour rain tearing me down.
I play my guitar in my room or my piano at the attic. I play by all heart and means, but I can't get the tunes that are in my head, down to my fingers. I post pictures on my wall, that I know I will tear down. I do things I never would have. I sit in that meadow with him. My fingers caressing his veins. His heart and his sins. I think of electric shocks. Then I run, until I can't feel the highway on my skin.
I see the sunset and the moon. I touch all the walls and I walk across all the bridges that we have made. Under the bridge there is water, and sad memories. The sand by the shore is made of old lovers diaries. Out in the sea sits a curly haired boy, playing the tunes in my head. Because when I am sad, he comes to me."

"Where do you go when you're happy?"
"I stay there..."

Ord eller handling

"Å avgjøre om livet er verdt eller ikke verdt å leve, det er å svare på filosofiens fundamentale spørsmål."

- Albert Camus

Somewhere in space, this may all be happening right now

Danse i kjelleren

Gå inn døren.
Alene.
Lage kaffe.
Ned i kjelleren.
Sett på Crystal Castles.
Høyt, høyt, høyt!
Av Med lysene.
Dans.

Krøllt sammen inntil veggen for varme...

Dyne
Teppe
T-shorte
Sokker
Flisdress
Ullundertøy

Og de fokkings ventilene va åpne heile tiden...

I've been so blind

Johan Harstad

ka va det igjen

minnene ser eg gjennom vinduer med pudder på

han satt bare der

han spiste bare der

musikk fra Kenya og han va bare der

rett foran meg va det vesen; Yasmin

hu satt der

hu spiste der

sauebrusk og hu satt der med mørke øyne

då me skiltes sa eg ha det bra

og me sang

og me sang

mannen smilte, gjekk forbi og me sang

takk for i kveld. snart e alt dette forbi. glømt. Fortrengt.

Bombesikkert

Uten en tråd

Happy birthday to you

I forgot you this year too

But maybe next year

I'll create more fear

22 minutes late

But I still mean it:
Happy Birthday ATA!

hugs and kisses
ln

venter på det ekte jubileumsinnlegget.
hya, det kommer, det kommer.
Bare vent!!

Av jord er du komen. Til jord skal du verta. Av jord skal du aldri stå opp.

Ei god forteljing.

Som musikken

Som ein gammal ven

Som luft

Han har alltid vore der

Ingen tårer

Kvar er kjenslene?

Når kjem sorga?

Ein dag snart ligg me alle i jorda

Eg gler meg

Quotation

"Hallo, fisker har dritsvære pupper under skinnet altså, de har naturlig BH'er under der..."
"Hm, ja eg har alltid trodd d eg å!"

Snijeg

Chasing cornflakes in november

first snow today
and the first really really cold day
standing with
friend or foe in black shoes
he won't tell, he won't even say

our lack of words perplexes me
a penny for your thoughts
like a summer breeze when it snows
you know, odd in a good way
can't stop looking at your,
pale blue eyes

we jump over black holes with rain in
we ¤&/%¤¤##¤%/&())(/&%¤%()/&
we paint rainbows in the dark
and drink tea until midnight
we make it so easy when it should be so hard
we fuck around with other people
and all I can think of while doing this is

you touch me when my skin spells
"he was here last winter"
and do all the things I hate
I hate the sun shining
it allways shines when I'm around you
I need my freedom too you know
but I would give
a penny for you

Haha fucker

Aaaarrg..

I know what you did last summer.

underneath you just a

pt. 2
pop the glock - uffie

Oh, you know nothing!

pt. 1
Still take you home - arctic monkeys

hey, you've been used!

fuck me up

and walk away

and leave me thinking

about you

De som ikke gråter

Dere er de tøffe jentene
- De som ikke gråter
Dere er de vakre jentene
- De som alle snur seg etter
Dere er de flinke jentene
- De som klarer alt uten egentlig å bry seg
Dere er de jentene som ingen fortjener

Likevel tror jeg dere gråter når andre ikke ser

Rain, smoke and music

stop putting dreams in my head

Blindvei

Eg e så forelska

Pressure

Eg drømte at eg drømte at eg blogga. Når eg våkna imorges ville eg blogga d same som eg drømte at eg drømte at eg hadde blogga, men eg huske d ikje. Så eg blogga dette her istedet, så nå har eg vertfall blogga någe.

In my panties

Ihadalotonm
ymindyester
daywhocame
upwiththisid
eaaboutstra
ngersinpara
diseanyway?

Lets play In my panties
It always makes me laugh...

Baby's got the bends

Barn av regnbuen

Jeg ser meg selv springe over regnbuen

Fram og tilbake fra farge til enda en farge

De skifter hele tiden, jeg klarer ikke å bestemme meg

For hvilken jeg liker best

Jeg prøver å bli fargeløs, springe bort fra fargene

Veggene stopper meg, kantene har vegger

Veggene har farger og jeg kommer meg ikke løs

It was good what we did last night

To Someone

I know that I have no right to ask you
So I will not
But I still wonder
Who could hurt you so?
Who broke your heart?

Men ikke si det til noen

Jeg er gal

Hodet mitt er en økologisk stoffpose

Og jeg er gal

Hun er gal

Du kjenner henne, hun som smiler hver dag

Hun sier hun er gal

Men hysj!

Ikke si det til noen

Hun vil ikke at så mange skal vite det

Orgorm

Plate fem ville jeg spille en kveld jeg var alene i rommet med Orgorm. Dessverre var platecoverets brødtekst revet av. Orgorm tok fatt i mine spinkle overarmer og kastet meg i bakken. "Vis meg den! Vis meg platen!" Men jeg kunne ikke finne den. Jeg kunne ikke fatte det. Orgorm var blitt til en knust colaboks som lå veltet på gulvet.

Den også har den ekle fargen, kildene har bare den ekle fargen... Men hva skal jeg gjøre med den ekle fargen? Ingenting.

A song from long ago, Violets mum

Pictures from the past
An inspiration to the future

for you

You can trust me

I'm no criminal

BUT I'D KILL MY MOTHER TO BE WITH YOU

...

and we'll stroll to the edge of the world...